Alcohol cravings, stress, and smoking

[xxmadsenxx]

I've been having cravings for alcohol. Specifically whiskey. Big surprise there, haha. I crave alcohol the most when I want to drown things out...and right now, I want to drown out EVERYTHING. I'm just so fucking stressed and worried, but I have to keep it in because I don't want to add to Jenny's stress. She's going through enough right now. No need to trouble her with more. I'm trying to hide it from Evan, too. He's too young to understand, and I don't want him to be worried. No point in stressing out a little kid. He was a little worried when Jenny was in the hospital a few days ago, but I assured him that everything was ok. He believed me, so he's fine. But kids seem to be really good at picking up on the emotions of the people around them, so I try to play it cool whenever I'm around him...which is a lot. So I'm hiding it all the time, because I'm always around Evan and/or Jenny. Anyway, the cravings aren't that bad, but they're bad enough to be bothersome. Oh well. They'll pass. It just sucks for the time being.

There's no way in hell I can try to quit smoking anytime soon. It's going to have to wait for at least a few months. I still want to quit before the baby comes, but who knows if that will actually happen. I am WAY too stressed to even attempt to quit right now, and by the time all this sickness shit with Jenny is over (if it's ever over), it will be close to the holidays. Also not a good time to quit. Maybe I'll start trying sometime around the beginning of next year.

Comments

[damedosbesos.livejournal.com]

I hope that things start going better for Jenny. This whole situation sucks. I feel terrible for you guys. You are definitely in my thoughts & prayers, as is she.

[xxmadsenxx.livejournal.com]

Thank you very much. :)