Evan's 6th Birthday

Evan’s birthday party was a success! It was fun. He’s obsessed with the Cars movies, and he wanted it to be a Cars themed pizza party. Jenny is so good with things like kids’ parties. She put together all kinds of games and fun prizes and things like that. They all had a lot of fun. I think he invited something like 10 kids. I didn’t actually count. Of course his little girlfriend was there. B and his girlfriend were there, of course, and his girlfriend brought her little niece over, who is about Evan’s age. So he made a new little friend. After the party B’s girlfriend said something like, “____(fill in her niece’s name here) is pretty cute, huh?” Evan replied with, “Yeah, she’s cool. But I already have a girlfriend.” Then she asked him if she was his only girlfriend, and Evan’s response was cute. He said, “Of course she’s my only girlfriend! You have to be faithful.” I guess I’ve taught him well, haha. They held hands a few times during the party. It was cute. He’s in kindergarten and is already all about girls…I’m going to have to keep my eye on him when he gets older haha. They’re pretty cute together though…as far as kindergarten couples go lol.

He was VERY excited about his iPod, and as soon as all the kids left he wanted to put music on it. Here’s what he has put on it so far. Not entire discographies of these artists or anything, but at least a few songs, and full albums of some of them. I screen it…he can’t listen to just ANYTHING he wants. So certain songs by some of these bands are not allowed.

Nirvana (his favorite band haha)
Justin Timberlake (Jenny’s influence shows there lol)
The Lion King soundtrack (he LOVES that movie)
Aladdin soundtrack
Some other Disney songs
The Beatles
The Doors
Queen (I know a few little kids who love Queen lol. It’s kinda funny.)
Sex Pistols -- “God Save the Queen” (He wants to listen to punk, since it’s my genre of choice, but most of it is NOT child appropriate lol. So he gets a few songs here and there.)
Rancid (a few songs)
NOFX (very few songs)
The Clash – Should I Stay or Should I Go
Adele
Bob Marley
The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air and Men in Black theme songs haha.
Incubus
Jack Johnson
Led Zeppelin
Some top 40 shit I don’t really know. Including that “Dynamite” song from a year or so ago that he has loved since it came out.
Sublime

And that’s what the playlist of my six-year-old looks like haha.

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention one cute/funny thing from his party. Evan had these little Cars birthday hats, and he attempted to put one on Jenny's belly "so that Ella could be a part of the birthday party." I thought that was pretty cute.

I love my little guy so much. I guess I won't be able to call him my "little guy" for that much longer. It kind of makes me sad. Six isn't that old, but it's still crazy to me.

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I'm going to try to quit smoking again in the next week or so. I'm still kind of upset with myself for smoking, but at least I haven't been smoking nearly as much as I used to. Not even close. But I already slipped up, so I'm going to let myself ride it out until I'm less stressed out over all the shit I've been dealing with at work. That, plus I already messed up, so I figure I can let myself enjoy it a little bit before trying again. I can't decide how I'm going to do it this time. I don't know if I want to just try it cold turkey again, or cut down slowly until I don't smoke at all. I don't like nicotine patches, and I HATE nicotine gum. It makes me feel sick. If I can't do it on my own, maybe I'll try Chantix. I know quite a few people who have successfully quit using that. I don't know. We'll see. I'd rather try it on my own (again) before trying that though.

Onto another subject. And the next subject is slightly TMI.

Jenny is so fucking sexy. I just have to say that, because this is my only outlet, since she's asleep. But damn...she looked AMAZING today. She always does, but I don't know what it was about today...she just looked absolutely gorgeous. I was kind of thinking, "Damn...I want these kids to go home so I can have her to myself." Haha. Seriously though. So now I'm sitting here extremely frustrated. She was a total tease tonight, too. The way she was kissing me and touching me tonight before she went to bed made it seem like more was going to happen, and I was pretty excited about it, but no...she went to sleep instead. Oh well. Sometimes her teasing is hot, but sometimes it's just plain frustrating. Like tonight. Damn...

Fuck. I am so insanely frustrated right now. I'm kind of glad I'm smoking at the moment. If I can't have what I really want right now, I guess a cigarette will suffice. Fuuuucccckkkk...I might have to attempt to wake her up. Lord knows she's done it enough to me while she's been pregnant. Before sometimes, too. But especially since she's been pregnant. She'll wake up when I get in bed anyway. So we'll see.

TMI, I know. But it's all that's on my mind right now. She is the sexiest woman in the world, and she doesn't even have to try. True, I'm biased, since she's the love of my life...but still. Nobody could possibly deny the fact that she's absolutely gorgeous. Just one reason of many that I'm so lucky to be with her. She's amazing.

Whitney, Jenny, Valentine's Day, and other stuff

It's crazy that Whitney Houston died. Well, not really. Crack is wack. But it's still weird. What's really weird is that just the other day I watched an old video of Jenny singing "I Will Always Love You" when she was a kid. She was only 10 or 11 in the video, and DAMN could she belt that song out! I was blown away. She still has an amazingly beautiful, strong voice. But I was amazed at hearing such a big voice coming out of such a little girl. She should have done something with her singing. But instead she got married and had a baby young. (I'm not talking about me and Evan. She had her daughter when she was 18.) I guess that's good though, because I never would have met her otherwise. But seriously, she has the most amazing voice. I love it when she sings. Today I heard her singing that "Rolling in the Deep" song by Adele, and she sounded SO good.

I finally figured out something super sappy to do for Valentine's Day lol. It's going to be all sentimental. She expects me to do sappy romantic stuff, so sappy romantic stuff is what she'll get haha. Maybe saying she expects me to do it isn't the right way to put it. I don't know. Anyway, I'm going to take her to dinner at the restaurant we went to for our very first date, ever. All the way back in 2004. Then later I'm going to play her the song I wrote for her when I asked her to marry me (the first time). I haven't played that song in AT LEAST five years, if not longer, so I need to practice it to make sure I still remember haha. I know I remember the guitar part of it, but I need to make sure I still remember all the lyrics. I'll just have to wait until she's out of the house for whatever reason. And of course she'll get the Valentine's Day staples: roses and chocolates. I already set it up to have two dozen long-stemmed red roses delivered. I've written about how Jenny LOVES jewelry, so I get it for her kind of a lot, because it's what she really likes. So I bought her this necklace with a ruby heart surrounded by little diamonds. It's a surprise. I know she'll love it, so I'm excited to give it to her. I love surprising her with stuff like that. Or with anything, really. I'm cheesy, I guess...sometimes I'll randomly have flowers sent to her, just for the hell of it. I don't know. She likes stuff like that, so I like doing things like that for her.

Evan told me that he HAS to get flowers for his girlfriend for Valentine's Day, haha. He's so funny. I'm pretty sure he's just about the most romantic six-year-old ever lol.

Some more TMI stuff. Sorry. Jenny's hormones have been raging again the past little while. It's been nice. I got my wish last night, haha. Or rather, very early this morning. She ended up being the one to wake me up. That's always a nice way to be woken up. It was even nicer to be able to go back to sleep afterward and sleep in a little bit together. Well, maybe not even nicer, but it was nice. I love lazy Sundays.

I just realized that the baby is due exactly three months from today! So crazy. I keep saying we need to get stuff done, but we REALLY need to. We're both so excited about Ella. Well, all of us are...me, Jenny, Evan, B, and our families and friends. I can't wait!

I showed Evan the baby/little kid pictures he wanted to see. When I showed him the one of me and Jeremy at his age in our little soccer uniforms, he said, "You guys looked just like me!" We didn't look JUST like him, but similar. He also said, "You guys look exactly the same! Which one's you?" I can tell, of course, since it's me. But we were most certainly as identical as you could get...at least as kids, before we started changing our hair and getting piercings and tattoos and stuff. I went through more piercings than Jeremy did, both before and after he died, but he had a lot more tattoos than I do. I only have a few. Anyway, then Evan said, "I really wish I could have met my Uncle Jeremy." I just said, "I wish you could have too, bud. He would have loved you." It makes me sad that my brother never got to meet Jenny or my kids. He died like five years before I even met Jenny. But still. I wish he could have met them. Looking at those pictures really made me miss him.