Whiskey/4.5 years sober
Sep. 10th, 2011 01:18 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
xxmadsenxxHaha it seems like those two things shouldn't be in the same subject line.
For some reason I'm really craving whiskey. It's not the usual type of craving for wanting to get drunk. I think whiskey is the type of alcohol I miss the most. Well, and sometimes beer. Mostly whiskey though. Having even just one Jack and Coke sounds really good right now. I don't even want it to get a buzz, let alone to get wasted. I guess I'm just craving the taste of it. It's really weird. I don't know if I've ever had a craving quite like this before. I'd much rather have this type than the wanting to get wasted type. It's not really bothering me too much. I kinda wish I could have just one since it sounds so good right now, but of course I'm not going to. I know I wouldn't stop at one. I'm the type of addict/alcoholic that can't just learn to do it in moderation. I have to abstain from everything completely, forever. Not even being able to have a drink with friends or on special occasions sucks sometimes, but it's the way it has to be. If I have to crave it, I'm glad I'm only craving the drink itself. Even thinking about it doesn't make me want to get drunk. That has definitely never happened before. I have craved just the taste of alcohol before, but thinking about it would eventually make me want to get drunk. Not this time. I honestly have no desire to actually drink, even though I'm thinking about it. That makes me feel really good. Obviously not craving it at all would be better, but I'm pretty happy about the fact that I don't want to drink right now. I guess the easiest way to put it is that want a drink, but I don't want to drink. Too bad cravings for coke and pills aren't like that. That would make things a hell of a lot easier...especially with cocaine. It's so much easier than it used to be though. It's definitely still hard sometimes, but it gets easier with time.
On a similar note...
I somehow forgot to post about this the other day. September 2nd marked 4.5 years clean and sober for me. I'm pretty proud of myself. :)
For some reason I'm really craving whiskey. It's not the usual type of craving for wanting to get drunk. I think whiskey is the type of alcohol I miss the most. Well, and sometimes beer. Mostly whiskey though. Having even just one Jack and Coke sounds really good right now. I don't even want it to get a buzz, let alone to get wasted. I guess I'm just craving the taste of it. It's really weird. I don't know if I've ever had a craving quite like this before. I'd much rather have this type than the wanting to get wasted type. It's not really bothering me too much. I kinda wish I could have just one since it sounds so good right now, but of course I'm not going to. I know I wouldn't stop at one. I'm the type of addict/alcoholic that can't just learn to do it in moderation. I have to abstain from everything completely, forever. Not even being able to have a drink with friends or on special occasions sucks sometimes, but it's the way it has to be. If I have to crave it, I'm glad I'm only craving the drink itself. Even thinking about it doesn't make me want to get drunk. That has definitely never happened before. I have craved just the taste of alcohol before, but thinking about it would eventually make me want to get drunk. Not this time. I honestly have no desire to actually drink, even though I'm thinking about it. That makes me feel really good. Obviously not craving it at all would be better, but I'm pretty happy about the fact that I don't want to drink right now. I guess the easiest way to put it is that want a drink, but I don't want to drink. Too bad cravings for coke and pills aren't like that. That would make things a hell of a lot easier...especially with cocaine. It's so much easier than it used to be though. It's definitely still hard sometimes, but it gets easier with time.
On a similar note...
I somehow forgot to post about this the other day. September 2nd marked 4.5 years clean and sober for me. I'm pretty proud of myself. :)
