![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
(no subject)
Jun. 24th, 2007 02:38 pmI have been ok lately, but for some reason when I woke up this morning it hit me again, so I have been pretty sad all day.
I feel like I have been kicked in the stomach. It's one more thing in my life that has gone wrong, and one more person that has fucked me over. I never expected it from her. Not in a million years. I have never loved someone as much as I love her, so the fact that she stopped feeling the same way really hurts. I know that she loves me, and that she WAS in love with me, but not the way that she was with Justin (her ex-husband).
I don't put up with cheating. It's unacceptable. But the pathetic thing is, I would have put up with it with her. She didn't sleep with him, and to my knowledge she still hasn't. They only kissed, but it still hurt. A lot. It would be fucked up no matter who it was with, but the fact that it was with her ex-husband really bothers me. I knew that they were having at least an emotional relationship for the past few months, so if you can "emotionally cheat" on someone, she was most definitely doing so. It really is pathetic...even if she would have slept with him I would have forgiven her. I would have been willing to work on our relationship and move past that, but unfortunately she doesn't want the same thing. It kills me that she has already leapt into another relationship with him. It was instantaneous. No time in between, at all.
I don't think that I will ever love another person as much as I love(d) her. She was my everything. I would have done anything for her. I still would. Sometimes I wonder if things would have been different if I didn't have so many problems throughout or relationship. This whole thing is probably my fault.
I need to stop feeling sorry for myself and just try to move on. Having my son really helps. If I didn't have him, I don't know what I would do.
Oh well. Life goes on, I guess.
I feel like I have been kicked in the stomach. It's one more thing in my life that has gone wrong, and one more person that has fucked me over. I never expected it from her. Not in a million years. I have never loved someone as much as I love her, so the fact that she stopped feeling the same way really hurts. I know that she loves me, and that she WAS in love with me, but not the way that she was with Justin (her ex-husband).
I don't put up with cheating. It's unacceptable. But the pathetic thing is, I would have put up with it with her. She didn't sleep with him, and to my knowledge she still hasn't. They only kissed, but it still hurt. A lot. It would be fucked up no matter who it was with, but the fact that it was with her ex-husband really bothers me. I knew that they were having at least an emotional relationship for the past few months, so if you can "emotionally cheat" on someone, she was most definitely doing so. It really is pathetic...even if she would have slept with him I would have forgiven her. I would have been willing to work on our relationship and move past that, but unfortunately she doesn't want the same thing. It kills me that she has already leapt into another relationship with him. It was instantaneous. No time in between, at all.
I don't think that I will ever love another person as much as I love(d) her. She was my everything. I would have done anything for her. I still would. Sometimes I wonder if things would have been different if I didn't have so many problems throughout or relationship. This whole thing is probably my fault.
I need to stop feeling sorry for myself and just try to move on. Having my son really helps. If I didn't have him, I don't know what I would do.
Oh well. Life goes on, I guess.
