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Hahaha Evan just told me that I say Boston wrong. I spent the first 20 years of my life there, and I reminded him of that. His response was, "Well you'd think you would know how to say it right then." Lol.

It's because he says it "Bah-ston" like most people do, and people from Boston say it with a longer "O" sound than that. Not a full long vowel sound, but with more "O" than "ah." Like an "owh" or "awh" sound...I don't even know. I don't know how you'd spell it out. I only have a tiny hint of an accent left, but I know there are some words I say with a slight accent, and Evan ALWAYS notices and points it out. He mostly points out words with an "ah" sound in them. I have mentioned more than a few times that I don't like the Boston accent, and I never had a real thick one. But now it's almost entirely gone and I'm very happy about that. Getting rid of the accent was partially due to conscious effort, but most of it just kinda went away with time. I'm trying to think of the word Evan always points out. "All" is the one he has probably pointed out the most. He thinks I say "dog" funny. It sounds normal to me. Jenny said it doesn't sound very much different than the way she says it. She said the vowel is just a tiny bit different. But Evan thinks it's hilarious.

That little story is probably way more amusing to me than it is to any of you haha. I just thought it was funny that he told me I said it wrong, even though I'm from there and he's never been there.

One of these days I'm going to talk to him with the thickest Boston accent I can possibly muster all day long and see how he likes that.
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I keep updating this stupid entry haha. That's ok. Beyonce is on right now, and apparently Ella likes her. She's bouncing around doing a little baby dance. It's pretty fucking cute. She's learning how to be bootylicious at a very early age.

I don't especially like Beyonce, but damn...she can shake it like no other. Jenny was like, "You're paying way more attention to Beyonce than you have to the whole Super Bowl so far." I told her that if the football players had bodies like that and could move like that, I'd be paying attention to them, too. Well, maybe not guys with bodies like that...that would be a little weird. But you catch my drift. I'm not a fan, but I have to admit...Beyonce is pretty fucking hot. She has an amazing body. I love curves like that.

I just realized that I can't root for the 49ers. If they won, they'd have more Super Bowl wins than the Cowboys. So I'm pulling a Romney and flip flopping. This Super Bowl is kinda boring so far. So far the commercials aren't too great, either. Evan laughed his ass off at that Doritos one with the goat though. When the goat made that weird high pitched noise, Evan about keeled over and died laughing lol. It was pretty funny to watch him. Now he wants a goat instead of a dog. So easily swayed...

Speaking of Evan, here's a little conversation we had about an hour ago:

Evan: Dad, why are you wearing a Cowboys hoodie?
Me: Because they're my team.
Evan: Yeah, but they're not playing.
Me: I know. And with the way they've been playing for a long time now, they'll probably never play in the Super Bowl again.
Evan: So why are you wearing their shirt today?
Me: Because I don't care about the other teams, so I'm supporting my team.
Evan: Yeah, but WHY? They're not playing, so it doesn't matter.
Me: I just felt like it, Ev. It's the principle of the thing. I guess. I don't know.
Evan: You're weird.
Me: I know.
Evan: Maybe next time you should root for a team that's actually playing.
Me: Probably.
Evan: You should probably learn how the Super Bowl works, Dad.


Everyone thinks it's weird that I like the Cowboys. I'm originally from Boston and spent 20 years of my life there, so I "should" like the Patriots. I fucking hate the Patriots though. It started as an act of rebellion lol. Well, as a kid I liked the Cowboys star, because I thought it was cool. But after that, it was kind of a rebellious thing. Pretty much everyone loved the Patriots, so I decided to hate them. My dad was a huge Patriots fan, and that was the deciding factor. I sure as hell didn't want to like his team. So I went for the Cowboys. I hate all Boston teams for the same reason. I don't like baseball AT ALL...I think it's boring as fuck. But I'd wear Yankees stuff sometimes just to piss off all the Red Sox fans. That rivalry is CRAZY. People actually get fucking pissed about that. Bostonians hate the Yankees so much it's insane, and vice versa. So yeah, that's the story of why I like the Cowboys. Plus we were fucking AMAZING back in the '90s, when we had Troy Aikman and Emmitt Smith. Now the Cowboys are just sad, and they have been for quite some time now. It's a little disheartening.

Evan just cracked up at another Doritos commercial. I see who's winning his "best commercials" vote.

I'm really not paying much attention to this game. The best part of it is watching Evan's reaction to some commercials lol.

Jenny is paying attention to a couple of the football players that she thinks are hot, and claims that football players have "cute butts in those tight little pants."
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Wow...my kid isn't a spoiled brat at all lol. (Total sarcasm there.) He borrowed my phone, went into notepad, and wrote what he called his "complete list" haha. If he thinks he's getting every single thing on this list...well, he's not lol. Here it is, copied and pasted:


Evan's Christmas list


Wii u
Crayola light up drawing thing
Crayola air brush thing
Hary Potter legos I don't have yet
Star Wars legos I don't have yet
That new Lego game
Pirate legos
Sled with brakes
Mario party 9 game
Pirate pajamas
How to train your dragon movie
Pokemon black 2 for DS
Lego hellicopter
Ninjago legos I don't have
Spungbob legos
Lego star wars wii game. Not clone wars cuz I have it but a different one
Lego batman Wii game
Super smash bros brawl Wii game
Epic Mickey 2 game
Diary of a wimpy kid book 7
Star wars angry birds stuffed animals
Vtek dinosaurs
Green chucks
Pirate chucks I desined from you cuz you said.
Kid camera
Power rangers megazord
Nerf gun


Ask Santa what he's getting me and what he's not getting me you and mom can.


Oh, can we? Lol. Thanks for your permission, Ev. He's a bit greedy. I'm not sure how I'm supposed to remember every specific Lego set he already has. It's going to take some detective work. Maybe Jenny will know. Kids, man...

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Evan cracks me up. He gave us all some Thanksgiving commentary about turkey. For the record, even though Jenny and I don't eat meat, we don't preach it to Evan. We don't tell him he can't eat it, and we don't say that it's wrong or anything. If he wants to eat it, that's fine. Jenny and I just don't. He's had various kinds of meat before and said he doesn't like it. I think a lot of it is just that he's at an impressionable age, so he goes along with what Jenny and I do without really questioning it. Plus he's not really used to meat since we don't eat it, so there's a good chance he really doesn't like it. It's just how he's been raised. I'm the only vegetarian in my family, so of course there was a giant turkey at my mom's house. Anyway, Evan went on a little tangent about Thanksgiving and turkey at dinner today. It was pretty fucking funny. At least we all thought so. Maybe you had to be there, I don't know. But here's what he said:

"I don't think people should say 'Happy Turkey Day' on Thanksgiving, because I'm pretty sure turkeys aren't very happy about today. And they're not thankful about Thanksgiving, either. Why do we have a holiday about killing turkeys? Turkeys never did anything to people, so we shouldn't have a holiday for killing them. The Pilgrims and the Indians had dinner and so we kill turkeys and then have turkeys all over the place looking happy, but they're not happy. They're dead. Dead meat! Having a holiday about corn makes more sense than turkey. They didn't even eat turkey on the first Thanksgiving. They ate corn. So Happy Corn Day."

He formed his opinions about Thanksgiving completely on his own. He's quite an opinionated little first grader, and he's so matter-of-fact about things. I love it. The way he said the little "Dead meat!" thing was pretty cute and funny. The whole thing was.

So, needless to say, Evan didn't eat turkey lol.

PS: I'll go back to not being a shitty LJ friend soon. I have just been SO incredibly busy with work. Well, it has been a combination of being sick, taking care of sick kids, and being busy with work. The last couple weeks have just been a bit hectic. So yeah...sorry about that. I've been trying to keep up as much as I can. I'll be better about it soon though.
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It's fucking freezing. We have a foot of snow in our yard. Literally, 12". Fucking sucks. Evan LOVES it. I hate it. He's been outside playing in it all day. And guess who got to shovel it all? Me. Conveniently, the snowblower is out of gas, and I couldn't get out of the driveway to go get any without shoveling it. I am so over the snow already, and it's only November. Ugh.

On the plus side, all I have to do the rest of the day is sit around doing nothing. Oh, and eat a lot. For breakfast I had apple pie and pumpkin pie. Then later I had cake that's like, half cake and half cheesecake. All the weight I unintentionally lost should be back in no time at all at this rate haha. And we have a bunch of stuffed shells left over from Jenny's grandma's birthday party last night. Jenny's mom made them, so they're the same as the ones Jenny makes that are AMAZING. Now I want go to eat some. Hmmm...

Oh yeah, speaking of snow, according to Jenny I was mean to Ella haha. I wanted to show her snow, so I bundled her up and took her outside and stuck her hand in it. She hated it and cried. Smart girl. I knew she was a genius. She cried and pretty much yelled at me. Seriously...she's six and a half months old and she yelled at me. I got "DADA!!!!" mid-crying. I thought it was funny. Jenny thought it was sad. Evan said he was going to throw "a baby sized snowball" at Ella and I told him I'd whitewash him if he did. Jenny also said that was mean. I wouldn't really. I told him I was kidding, but that he'd better not. So he threw one at me instead.

No work tomorrow. Hell yes!

Things are still great with Jenny. She's doing so well. It's amazing how quickly she turned things around. She's trying really hard and it shows. I think she needed the Seroquel in addition to her other meds. Her psychiatrist said he doesn't think she'll need it forever, but wants her on it for at least the next six months. Now that she's a lot more stable we're going to start couple's therapy again. We need to be really diligent about it, just like she has to be with her own personal therapy. I have to say, I'm still a little afraid of getting married. Well, not afraid. Anxious. Today Jenny said, "I have so much planning and stuff to do! Our wedding is only four months and 12 days away!" I just thought, "Holy shit, that's soon." Instead I just kinda did the smile and nod thing and made some generalized comment like "Yeah, there's a lot to do" or something like that. It's going to be here before we know it. Crazy. Don't get me wrong, I'm really happy to be marrying her. I wouldn't want to spend the rest of my life with anyone else. It just makes me a little nervous, and it's crazy that it's coming up so soon.

I really will catch up with you guys for real tonight.
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Dude...I don't know about this Trazodone. The past week I have been miraculously going to bed early. I think it's because I was pretty much forced to for a few days on that trip so my body got used to it. I'm sure I fucked it up today though. I took Trazodone last night and fell asleep a little before 11:30. I briefly woke up to get Evan ready for school while Jenny fed Ella. I was still tired and groggy so I told Jenny I was going to go to work late. She let me go back to sleep and took Evan to school. I usually take him on my way to work. Well...I slept through work. I didn't wake up until 3:30! Jenny told me she tried to wake me up at about 11:00 to go to work. I have no recollection of that whatsoever. That shit knocked me the fuck out. Now I remember why I quit taking it shortly after it was prescribed years ago. Yeah, it keeps me asleep, but it keeps me asleep all day. I'm going to keep taking it for a few days to see if that effect wears off. If it doesn't I'm going to have to stop taking it. I don't have the luxury of sleeping for half a day everyday. Even if I did, that wouldn't be good for me. Maybe I can just reset my sleep schedule and then quit taking it. I don't know. We'll see.

I'm still not used to this phone. I can't decide how I feel about it. It's really nice, but I'm just so used to the iPhone. It's going to take a while to get used to it. Evan told me he likes my iPhone better haha. That's just because he knows how to use it. And he's mad about losing progress on his games and having to start over.

Oh, some Evan news that he's super excited about. He's in the advanced reading group in his class. It's just him and three other kids in that group. They have these little sets of books, and he came home SO excited because his group gets to skip ahead a whole set, which is eight books. So his group is a full level ahead of the rest of the class. He's funny. He came home really excited and bragged about it. We let him have his bragging moment and told him we were proud of him, but then told him he can't brag to the other kids about it, because bragging might make them feel bad. He seemed to understand that and said he wouldn't, so I hope he won't. I don't think he will though...he's really considerate of other people's feelings. So I don't think he'll brag since we told him that bragging could hurt people's feelings. He's a really sweet kid. I'm really proud of him. I think reading to your kids starting when they're babies is REALLY important. It helps their vocabulary develop. Evan has had an advanced vocabulary basically since he started talking. He said his first word ("Dada" :) ) at six months, and was speaking full sentences before he was a year and a half old. Regularly. And I taught him how to read when he was three. He has always been a fast learner. Now I'm the one bragging but it's my right as a parent haha.

Man, I have to say, I like the auto correct on my iPhone way more. This one is like...all predictive text auto correct and I have always hated predictive text. So this is going to take some getting used to. I never used to use my phone to update, but I've been using it a lot lately. I don't know why. It's much faster and easier to just use the computer. I guess it will help me get used to typing on this phone though. It's weird how even typing is different on a different phone.

I know I keep saying I'll catch up with you guys, but I haven't yet. Sorry, I've been kind of a shitty LJ friend the past week. I'll change that this weekend. For real this time haha. Ella is finally starting to feel a bit better, so I'll have more time and energy.

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Very short, random entry.

I mentioned Evan saying this before, but I really don't know where he got the term "chowda head" from ("chowder head" in a Boston accent). Seriously. He has been to Boston ONCE, when he was tiny. I don't say it. If I've said it, it has been maybe once. I never really used that term. It's stupid. It MUST be my from my brother, although I don't think he really says it either. He uses more Boston slang than I do though, and he has more of an accent than I do...but still not a strong one, thankfully. Today Evan was playing video games, and he kept calling the bad guys chowda heads. Lol. It was strange, but kind of amusing. I seriously have no idea where it came from. My brother? Sister? I HIGHLY doubt it was my mom, and I really doubt it was my sister. It MUST have been my brother. Strange. At least he's not swearing anymore, so there's that, haha. The last thing I need is "fucking chowda head" coming out of his mouth. I hope I didn't speak too soon. He hasn't used any words like that for a while. That kid, man...

Oh man, I am so fucking tired today. It was another long night. Not as long as the night before, but still really long. Ella kept both of us awake for a lot of the night. I REALLY hope this colic thing eases up soon. That, plus she needs to get better about sleeping in her crib. But it's mostly the colicky thing. It makes her scream all the time. Not cry...scream. For long periods of time. It's like clockwork, too. We can easily predict when it's going to happen. It's a routine. A really, really shitty routine.

It's nap time. Maybe. A power nap, anyway. If I take a long nap I'll be up all night, although I probably will be anyway. But it's definitely time for a power nap.
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I had a great Father's Day. I am so lucky to have the family that I have.

This is going to be a really cheesy entry, but it should be no surprise to anyone that I'm super cheesy sometimes haha. In light of Father's Day, I just want to say how thankful I am for my kids. Being a dad is the best thing I have ever, ever done.

As lame as this might sound, having Evan honestly saved my life. Yes, I relapsed when he was an infant, but I got clean for good when he was 13 months old. If it weren't for him, I don't know if I ever would have done it. He has been my motivation for staying sober the last 5+ years. To be exact, 5 years, 3 months, and 15 days. That’s pretty fucking amazing to me. Of course Ella motivates me too, and I love her with all my heart, but she’s brand new…she wasn’t around when I was struggling to quit drinking and doing drugs. I still struggle sometimes, and I’m sure I always will, but not like I used to. I finally decided that I wanted to get clean for myself, but Evan was my main motivation. He was my driving force. Seriously, he saved my life. The few years that I was a single dad were difficult; especially since I was newly sober. But I will always be eternally grateful for the few years that it was just me and Evan. I’m extremely happy that Jenny and I are back together and that we’re a family again, but those few years with Evan were life-changing. I developed a bond with him like I have never felt with anyone else. Of course I have a strong bond with Ella, too. I’m not saying that I love Evan more. I love them equally. But the bond I have with Evan is unique. Being a single dad made me grow up. For the first time ever, I put someone else before myself, 100% of the time. He was my first priority, no matter what. My kids are still my first priority and always will be. But it really was a life-changing experience. I alone was responsible for the life of another person, and it changed me forever in so many ways. All really good ways.

I love Evan and Ella so much. Being a dad can be hard at times, and it was really hard in the beginning. Hell, it’s still hard with Ella. But I wouldn’t change it for the world. The amount of love I feel for my kids is incredible. I can’t even begin to describe how much I love them or how happy they make me. I am so happy and so proud to be their dad. I feel like the luckiest person in the world to have them.

So there’s my sappy Father’s Day entry haha. Happy Father’s Day to the other dads out there. I hope you’ve had a great day. You deserve it.
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This entry is going to be completely pointless. I just feel like sitting around being lazy until we have to leave for the BBQ at Jenny's parents' house. It's Father's Day, so I can. I'm not moving until we have to go. I'm going to sit on my ass drinking my Diet Coke, writing about butt shaking.

I got smacked for Father's Day! Jokingly smacked, but still smacked! I get in these super hyper, obnoxious ADHD type moods sometimes (thank you, ADHD! Sometimes you're cool!), and I was in one a little while ago. So I decided it would be a good idea to do an impression of Beyonce. I was singing "Bootylicious" to Jenny and doing some stupid little dance. Then I decided to go dance on her and rub my butt against her for the sake of the song. I told her I didn't think she was ready for this jelly. She laughed at me and then told me that I have no ass, so I was singing the wrong song. I responded with, "That's ok, you have more than enough ass for the both of us," and got smacked lol. Just in the arm, jokingly. She pretended to be appalled and offended, but she wasn't. She knows I was kidding. Besides, I like big butts and I cannot lie. Jenny does have a big butt, but it's pretty amazing. I love it. She has a very nice ass. Aside from her face, it was actually the first thing I noticed about her when I first met her lol. So then I proceeded to rap "Baby Got Back" to her. She knows she loved it. It got even better though. Evan came in when I was singing/rapping/whatever you want to call it, and joined in. He yelled, "My anaconda don't want none unless you got buns, hun!" Jenny and I busted out laughing lol. She asked "How do you know that song?!" He replied with, "How do you think?" and looked and motioned at me. Jenny just laughed and shook her head. Hahaha. Then Evan went "Shake it! Shake it! Shake that healthy butt! Baby got back" and did a little butt-shaking dance. Jenny laughed and said, "You're your father's son, alright." Damn right. I have taught him well. Then it got even better again. Evan said, "I think it's a good thing that Dad was singing that song to you, Mom. I've heard him say you have a nice ass." I fucking lost it laughing lol. Jenny just looked at me and said, "CHRISTOPHER!" Hahahahaha. I am highly amused today. Then she told me I'm lucky it's Father's Day. Haha.

I'll shut up now. We have to leave in like 15 or 20 minutes. I just felt like sharing my ass shaking adventures with you guys.
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I just had an interesting conversation with Evan while I was getting him ready for bed. Here's how that went:

Evan: Guess what, Dad?
Me: What, Ev?
Evan: Me and Isabella are getting serious.
Me: What do you mean you're getting serious?
Evan: Our relationship. It's getting serious.
Me: How is it getting serious?
Evan: We don't just hold hands and hug anymore and sometimes kiss on the cheek. Now we kiss.
Me: You kiss?
Evan: Yep. We kissed for the first time today. And then again at recess and then after school.
Me: (I was thinking "Oh God" haha) What kind of kiss?
Evan: A REAL kiss.
Me: What's a "real" kiss?
Evan: On the lips, duh. What do you think?
Me: Like a dry kiss? Or wet?  (I didn't know what to say lol. I didn't want to full on explain kissing with tongue or anything to my freaking six-year-old. I didn't think that's what he was doing, but I wanted to make sure. I don't think kids his age really know about that stuff, but I also don't think most of them "date" the same girl for a year lol. Not that French kissing is exactly "wet" (unless you kiss a sloppy kisser...then it sure can be)...I don't know, I couldn't think of a better term and I had no idea what to say. Semi-wet? Wet-ish? I don't fucking know. I wasn't going to say "Did she stick her tongue in your mouth/did you stick your tongue in her mouth?" because I would have felt really weird, and I didn't want to give him ideas if that wasn't what happened lol. Plus the "wet/dry" thing is what my mom asked me when I told her that a neighbor girl who was a year older kissed me in like first grade lol. When in doubt, I do what my mom did haha.)
Evan: Why would it be wet? She's not a dog. Not all slobbery.
Me: Ok, just making sure.
Evan: You're weird sometimes.
Me: I know.

Man, that kid...
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Hahahahaha. Evan just went outside and picked a bunch of flowers out of the yard and made a bouquet for Jenny. Normally she'd probably get mad at him for picking that many flowers, because she worked hard on her garden. But it was endearing. I got her a big bouquet of flowers and said it was from Evan and me on the card, but he wanted to get her his own. I told him I'd take him to go get some, but he said "No, it's ok," and went off and did his own thing, which meant picking a bunch of flowers from the garden. Hey, at least he picked our flowers and not the neighbors' flowers haha. It was a nice thought. He's a sweet kid. I thought it was pretty funny though, because he picked way more than just a few. I tried not to laugh when I saw what he had done. He brought the flowers in and asked me for some ribbon, so I got him some and he tied the bouquet together with a pink ribbon. Then he asked for a vase to put them in, but said he had to give them to her out of the vase with the ribbon first, because "it looks nice and pretty that way, and Mom likes pink girly things." He also chose a stuffed Minnie Mouse to get for Jenny while we were in Disneyland, so he gave that to her along with the flowers. Jenny loved both things, even if he did destroy part of her flower garden hahaha.

Ok, two Mother's Day updates are enough for one day. It's a nice change from the long, negative entry I posted last night though.

Once again, I hope all you moms out there have a really good Mother's Day!

Oh, I forgot to add this. Evan drew a picture for Jenny in Paint and printed it. It's pretty cute, so I thought I'd share it here. Not bad if I do say so myself...it's probably better than I could do lol. Especially the writing. It's hard to write in Paint without the text tool!

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Lol Evan cracks me up. I walked by his room and heard him singing something, so I stopped and listened because I thought it was cute, and I thought what he was singing was hilarious. He had his little guitar out and was pretending to play along with it while he sang.

This is what my little just barely six-year-old was singing:

God save the Queen
We mean it, maaaan
There is no future
And England's dreaming
No future
No future
No future for you
(repeated a few times)
(Then at the end he went:)
No future for yooooooooooooouuuuuu! (then did some dramatic little motion like he was strumming down hard at the end, and then lifted it in the air)

He's so funny. I just think it's hilarious to hear a little kid singing a song by the Sex Pistols. Obviously my influence is there, haha. It sure as hell wasn't Jenny that taught him that. It's on his iPod. But the thing he did with his guitar at the end was hilarious. I had to hurry and walk away so that he wouldn't hear me laugh.

I just had to post about that, because I thought it was pretty cute and really funny. I wish I had it on video.
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Evan’s birthday party was a success! It was fun. He’s obsessed with the Cars movies, and he wanted it to be a Cars themed pizza party. Jenny is so good with things like kids’ parties. She put together all kinds of games and fun prizes and things like that. They all had a lot of fun. I think he invited something like 10 kids. I didn’t actually count. Of course his little girlfriend was there. B and his girlfriend were there, of course, and his girlfriend brought her little niece over, who is about Evan’s age. So he made a new little friend. After the party B’s girlfriend said something like, “____(fill in her niece’s name here) is pretty cute, huh?” Evan replied with, “Yeah, she’s cool. But I already have a girlfriend.” Then she asked him if she was his only girlfriend, and Evan’s response was cute. He said, “Of course she’s my only girlfriend! You have to be faithful.” I guess I’ve taught him well, haha. They held hands a few times during the party. It was cute. He’s in kindergarten and is already all about girls…I’m going to have to keep my eye on him when he gets older haha. They’re pretty cute together though…as far as kindergarten couples go lol.

He was VERY excited about his iPod, and as soon as all the kids left he wanted to put music on it. Here’s what he has put on it so far. Not entire discographies of these artists or anything, but at least a few songs, and full albums of some of them. I screen it…he can’t listen to just ANYTHING he wants. So certain songs by some of these bands are not allowed.

Nirvana (his favorite band haha)
Justin Timberlake (Jenny’s influence shows there lol)
The Lion King soundtrack (he LOVES that movie)
Aladdin soundtrack
Some other Disney songs
The Beatles
The Doors
Queen (I know a few little kids who love Queen lol. It’s kinda funny.)
Sex Pistols -- “God Save the Queen” (He wants to listen to punk, since it’s my genre of choice, but most of it is NOT child appropriate lol. So he gets a few songs here and there.)
Rancid (a few songs)
NOFX (very few songs)
The Clash – Should I Stay or Should I Go
Bob Marley
The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air and Men in Black theme songs haha.
Jack Johnson
Led Zeppelin
Some top 40 shit I don’t really know. Including that “Dynamite” song from a year or so ago that he has loved since it came out.

And that’s what the playlist of my six-year-old looks like haha.

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention one cute/funny thing from his party. Evan had these little Cars birthday hats, and he attempted to put one on Jenny's belly "so that Ella could be a part of the birthday party." I thought that was pretty cute.

I love my little guy so much. I guess I won't be able to call him my "little guy" for that much longer. It kind of makes me sad. Six isn't that old, but it's still crazy to me.


Dec. 28th, 2011 10:09 pm
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I hope you all had a great Christmas! I know we did. Jenny surprised me with an amp that I really wanted. I also got a few video games, some DVDs, clothes, stuff like that. We got Evan a TON of stuff. I think we went a bit overboard. That seems to happen every year though haha. Oh well, I'm glad we're able to do it. I got B a new acoustic guitar, which he was REALLY excited about. I got Jenny a Kindle Fire or whatever, and a bunch of other smaller stuff. Well, I guess the necklace I got her doesn't really count as "smaller stuff." Not at all. Nice jewelry isn't cheap! But Jenny loves it, sooo she gets it. Evan didn't forget about the bracelet he wanted to get for Jenny, so I caved. I don't think a kindergartner needs to give his mother a $250 bracelet, but he wanted to get it for her SO bad. He had his heart set on it, which I thought was pretty cute. Apparently he has very good taste in jewelry, because Jenny loved it. He also got his little "girlfriend" jewelry for Christmas, although it definitely wasn't anything like what he got for Jenny haha. No way am I spending more than like $20 on jewelry for his 5-year-old so-called girlfriend lol. So Jenny took him to pick something out for her. I have created a monster by feeding into Jenny's love for jewelry all the time. Evan really is convinced that he has to get jewelry for girls. I'm screwed lol. Oh well, his little girlfriends aren't getting diamonds until he can buy them himself.

Evan said another thing he shouldn't have said. He didn't swear this time, but he did something I specifically told him not to do. A while ago I had a talk with him about never saying anything about Jenny "getting fat," since that's what he called it before. Well, he did. We were watching The Santa Clause and he made a joke about Tim Allen's character "getting a big, fat, round tummy just like Mommy," AND of course he said it in front of her. I don't remember EXACTLY what he said, but it included what I just mentioned, word for word. There was more to it than that. I just don't remember what his actual joke was. I know he was kidding, but I had specifically told him NEVER to say anything like that, and especially never to use the word "fat" around Jenny. So much for listening to Dad, haha.

I have only felt the baby move like twice since I felt it the first time. I'm sure I'll feel her move a lot more later on though, and it's not like the first time was very long ago. It is seriously the coolest feeling. I've noticed that I automatically rest my hand on Jenny's belly a lot, like when we're just sitting around or lying in bed. I don't even do it on purpose...my hand just goes there automatically. I didn't really notice that I did it so much until B's girlfriend said something along the lines of, "It's so cute how you always have your hand on Jenny's belly!" I knew I did it sometimes, but I didn't realize just how often. Jenny doesn't mind, so it's all good. In fact, a lot of the time she puts her hand over mine. It's kind of nice. I guess I just like being able to feel the baby, whether she's moving or whether I'm just putting my hand on Jenny's rapidly growing baby bump. I like it. I'm cheesy, I know. I'm just really happy and excited about the baby. Jenny is almost 21 weeks pregnant, so more than halfway through! I can't wait. :)


Dec. 23rd, 2011 07:56 pm
xxmadsenxx: (Default)
Evan said "fuck" for the first time today. He was playing a video game and he said, "Fuuuccckkk! I died!" I know I shouldn't have laughed, but I couldn't help it. I busted out laughing. When I stopped I managed to say, "Evan, that's a REALLY bad word. Don't say it again." Then I started laughing again. Jenny heard him say it too...she was in the kitchen, but he kind of yelled it. Plus I swear, Jenny has radar ears. I think that must be a mom thing. She hears everything. So she yelled, "CHRISTOPHER!!! Get in the kitchen! RIGHT NOW!" I knew I was in trouble lol. She only calls me Christopher when she's mad at me. Kind of like how my mom used to call me by my full name--first, middle, and last--when she got really mad at me haha. It seems like a lot of moms do that. Jenny has actually done it to me a few times too lol. I got up from the couch and went into the kitchen, while trying to make myself stop laughing. The second I entered the room she started scolding me. I felt like a little kid whose mom was yelling at him about something lol. This is how that went:

Jenny: Chris! Stop laughing!
Me: I'm sorry, it's funny.
J: It is NOT funny. You're only encouraging him by laughing!
Me: I told him not to say it again.
J: While laughing.
Me: Sorry.
J: What happened to watching your mouth around him? You know he idolizes you and is going to repeat anything you say. He's five years old! He should NOT be saying that word!
Me: He's almost six. (I said that because sometimes I'm kind of a smart ass.)
J: Dammit, Christopher! (again with the Christopher thing lol. So I started laughing again.)
Me: How do you know he heard it from me?
J: Oh please. He said it EXACTLY the way you say it when you're playing video games.
Me: How do I say it? (I knew full well what she was talking about. I just wanted to hear her do it lol.)
J: Loud and dragged out. "Fuuuuuuuccckkk!" He sounded EXACTLY like you. (I busted out laughing again, partially because her impression was hilarious and partially because it's true...that's how I say it when I'm playing games, and that's exactly how Evan said it.)
Me: (I just started laughing again.)
J: Stop laughing! You need to fix this. You're the one he learned it from, so YOU need to make sure he knows that it's not ok. WITHOUT LAUGHING.
Me: (I jokingly made an over-exaggerated attempt to stop laughing and calm down, which Jenny rolled her eyes at lol.) Ok! I'm not laughing anymore. You killed it. (I said that jokingly, of course.)
J: (Jenny shot me a look.) I'm serious.
Me: Ok!

So then I went back into the room where Evan was and told him that I shouldn't have laughed when he said that, because saying that word isn't funny. I reiterated the fact that it was a really bad word that he's not supposed to say. I didn't notice until after I said that, but Jenny had followed me out of the kitchen and into the room Evan and I were in. She was standing at the edge of the room with her arms folded, making sure I did what she told me to do lol. After I talked to Evan his eyes went right back to being glued to the video game. Jenny was still standing there, so I shot her a "Hail Hitler" arm gesture (jokingly, obviously). Her response to that was "Chris! Grow up!" Then she went back into the kitchen where she was making brownies.

I don't want Evan saying that word, but I still thought it was fucking hilarious. I realize that I say it way too much, but I'm usually pretty good about not swearing in front of him. My friend Nick came over earlier today and we were playing Madden, so I'm sure a few "Fuuuuccckkks" came out lol. He must have overheard it. I don't know. I'm REALLY bad about not laughing when I shouldn't though. Really bad. Jenny always gets mad at me for it. I know laughing when a little kid says bad words or does things they shouldn't do does kind of encourage them, but sometimes I can't help it. It was funny. I was definitely pretty amused by it.
xxmadsenxx: (Default)
I'm having one of those minor alcohol cravings, where I don't want to get drunk or anything...I'm just craving a drink. For the taste of it, I guess. It's not really bothering me...it's not that type of craving. For some reason a beer sounds really good right now. I'm not depressed. I'm not upset. I don't want it for some emotional reason. I just feel like having one. Just one beer. But I can't stop at one drink, so of course I won't have one. There's a no alcohol rule in my house, so it's not like there's any around anyway. Well, even if that rule wasn't in place, there wouldn't be any here right now anyway; Jenny is pregnant, and B can't drink for the same reason I can't (plus he's 17). But even when my older brother lived with me, there was no alcohol allowed in the house. At all. Just having it here would be way too tempting. And if there was whiskey in the house? Fuck that. It would be REALLY hard for me to resist it. That was my drink. Damn, now I could really go for a Jack and Coke. I'll settle for a plain old Diet Coke though. Aspartame is better than alcohol haha.

I forgot to go buy cigarettes today. Now I'm stuck with the few non-menthol ones I have left. I'm sure the only reason I even have any left is because I don't like them. Oh well. Whatever. Better than nothing.

I made one of those Christmas countdown paper chains with Evan today. The ones where you make chain links out of construction paper that alternate between red and green, and you tear one off each day of December until Christmas. My mom used to make them with us when we were little. He enjoyed it. He's also excited about his chocolate Advent calendar that he gets to start using tomorrow. I used to love those. I should have gotten myself one haha. You're never too old for a daily dose of chocolate!

The Christmas countdown thing just reminded me of something. One year, when I was like 18, my brother, my friends and I did this thing we called the Cocktail Countdown to Christmas. We made this giant poster with a different drink and the recipe or whatever you want to call it for each day in December. Well, each day until Christmas. Christmas was the "all you can drink" day haha. We had a shit load of stuff that day. Pretty much every type of alcohol you can get. I got so fucked up that Christmas, after I was done with my family stuff. That night was crazy. Anyway, each day we'd make the designated daily cocktail, and then cross off that date with a Sharpie. It was a pretty fun countdown.

Time for a Diet Coke and a cigarette. Two of the things I love most, haha. Just for the hell of it, and because I'm kinda bored, here's a list of the things I love most, off the top of my head. These things are in no particular order (but of course my family is what I love the very most):

- Evan and the new baby
- Jenny
- B
- My mom, my siblings, and the rest of my family
- My friends
- Cigarettes
- Diet Coke
- Guitar
- Music in general
- Naps
- Sex (regardless of my bitching lately haha)
- Kissing (Sex aside. And Jenny is an AMAZING kisser. Seriously, amazing. I could kiss her all day, with or without sex. Ok, now I sound lame. I'll shut up about that.)
- Coffee
- Chocolate
- Ice cream
- Pizza
- Free time
- Technology, because without forms of technological entertainment I'd be bored as hell a lot of the time.

That's all I can think of right now. Pointless list, I know. But it killed a couple minutes.
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I'm sorry that I've been posting so much about the new baby lately. It's probably getting annoying haha. But I had a pretty interesting conversation about it with Evan about an hour ago. I had to try pretty hard not to laugh a few times. I didn't want him to think that I wasn't taking his questions seriously, or that I was laughing at him. So I tried to give him simple answers while holding back laughter. But some of the things he said were pretty funny. It went like this:

Evan: How much longer 'til the baby comes?
Me: About five and a half months. The baby will be here sometime in May.
E: But I don't want to wait that long. I want to be a big brother now!
Me: I know you do. But the baby has to grow in Mommy's tummy a lot more before it can be born.
E: Why can't they just take it out now? It can be a small baby.
Me: It doesn't work that way, bud.
E: Why?
Me: Because it takes a while for a baby to develop. It's not ready to come out yet. A baby has to grow for a long time before it's born, because otherwise it won't be healthy. The baby will come when it's ready.
E: Well I wish it would be ready now. It should hurry up.
Me: I know. I wish the baby could be here sooner too, but it can't. Not until it's a lot bigger.
E: How big is it right now?
Me: Tiny. About the size of an apple or orange. (I only know this because Jenny gets these weekly e-mails telling her stuff like that, and she tells me about them.)
E: Well Mom's tummy is way bigger than an orange.
Me: I know. That's because the area the baby is in grows bigger and takes up space too.
E: So since the baby's growing Mommy's tummy will get way fatter and rounder too, right?
Me: Don't ever tell her she has a fat tummy, Evan. That would make her feel bad. But yes, it will get a lot bigger and rounder.
E: Ok, I won't tell her that. But it WILL be fat and round.
Me: Not fat, just round. She's not getting fat. It's just the baby growing bigger. I'm serious, Evan...don't tell her she has a fat tummy. Ever. No matter how big it gets.
E: Ok, I won't! I promise.
Me: Thank you.
E: Well since the baby won't be here for a long time, how much longer 'til Christmas?
Me: A month and six days.
E: Man, I have to wait a long time for everything!

I'm sure that conversation was way more amusing to me than it would be to any of you, but I felt like posting it anyway, if only for documentation since it's still fresh in my mind haha.

I've noticed that B and I have gotten Evan to start saying "man" a lot lol. Not intentionally, of course. But I know we both say it quite a bit, and Evan has picked up on it. It's a good thing we're both really good about censoring what we say around him, or he'd pick up on A LOT more haha. I don't really want a kindergartner who swears like a sailor. I slip up occasionally, but I never say anything too bad around him. He has said "dammit" two or three times before, and I had to tell him not to say that. He also said "What the hell?!" about something once, so of course I had to tell him not to say that either. It was pretty fucking funny, but I managed not to laugh. I didn't want to encourage him. Jenny would kill me if she heard him say stuff like that haha. Luckily he hasn't said anything like that for about six months now. I seriously love some of the things he says though. The things kids say can be pretty damn amusing.

Man, I'm tired. I only got like three hours of sleep last night, tops. For a good reason though...Jenny's horny hormones. Haha. Sorry, you probably don't want to know that. We also went to bed late to begin with though, because we stayed up watching movies. I am seriously in zombie mode right now. I need a nap. That sounds amazing right now. It's so nice to have a lazy weekend.
xxmadsenxx: (Default)
Jenny is 15 weeks pregnant now. We just started telling other people about the baby. It's nice to not have to keep it a secret from everyone but our immediate families and just a couple close friends anymore.

We told Evan about the baby yesterday. It's crazy how much more he understands this time compared to last time, with the baby we lost. Well, I guess it's not crazy, since he was over a year younger then. But there was still a huge difference in his level of understanding. He's excited about it. He said that he can't wait to have a baby brother or sister, and then he said, "I'm going to be the best big brother in the whole world!" It was really cute.

Evan said something hilarious when we told him, too. He looked at Jenny and put his hand on her stomach and said, "So that's a baby in there. Oh, ok. I thought you were just getting a fat tummy." I busted out laughing. Jenny blushed and laughed a little. I think she felt kind of embarrassed or something. Or at least self-conscious. I don't know. But it was fucking hilarious. Sometimes kids say the funniest things. I love how uncensored they are. You can definitely tell she's pregnant, unless she's intentionally wearing certain styles of shirts or jackets or whatever to hide it. But now she doesn't need to do that anymore. She wouldn't be able to hide it much longer if she tried to, anyway.

I told a few of my coworkers, so of course the whole office found out. News like that seems to travel fast haha. Jenny and I went to dinner with a group of friends tonight, and told them. That's not why we went to dinner with them or anything...it just made sense to tell them since we were all together. There were eight of us, and I hadn't seen half of them for a few months, so it was pretty fun. I'm glad the secret's out. Our extended families will find out about it on Thanksgiving, and everyone else will find out about it sometime soon, I'm sure. I have already told a few other friends, and so has Jenny. Everyone has been really supportive and happy for us. It's such a relief to be in the "safe zone" now. We both feel SO much better, because we can finally just relax and stop worrying about it. We haven't really been THAT worried for the past month or so, but we're both still really relieved.

I think the fact that we told Evan about the baby together this time says something about us as a family. When Jenny was pregnant before, I talked to Evan about it by myself, because at that time I knew he'd feel more comfortable and more willing to ask any questions he had if it was just me. Jenny hadn't even moved in yet. They had a pretty good relationship then, but he still hadn't entirely warmed up to her. Now things are totally different. I think he'll always be closer to me than he is to Jenny, but they have a really good relationship, and they're close. He trusts her and opens up to her now, and I am so happy about that. Jenny is too. I know how sad she was about Evan not fully trusting her and not being very close to her. She has worked really hard to repair her relationship with him, and it has definitely paid off. Being able to sit down as a family to talk about it meant a lot to me. It might not sound like that big of a deal, but it was to me. I just feel like it shows how far we've come together.

I still can't get over Evan telling Jenny he thought she was just getting a fat tummy lol. Maybe it's one of those things where you just had to be there, but was seriously fucking HILARIOUS.
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The Smurfs are a lot more annoying than I remember them being. I watched the original series when I was a kid, and I loved it back then. Evan watches the reruns now. So they're the exact same episodes I used to watch, just way more annoying now that I'm not a kid. Using "smurf" in place of another word every single sentence isn't cute and it isn't funny. It's annoying. So, needless to say, I really do not want to say the movie. But I have to tomorrow. Evan and I are having an "Evan and Daddy Day" tomorrow. Like the "Mommy/Daughter Day" thing Jenny does with her daughter. We do it quite a bit. We did when it was just the two of us, too. I spend a ton of time with him at home, but we have our special days to go out and do something, just the two of us. On those days and/or nights we go out to eat wherever he wants to, then go do some type of activity, also usually of his choice. Well, he wants to go see the Smurf movie. So that's what we're doing. Lucky me. Don't get me wrong, I'm happy to be going with him. I love having these days with him. I'm just not happy about the fact that I have to sit through that movie. Oh well, maybe it won't be as bad as I'm thinking it will be.

Anyway, onto another topic.

B is doing much better today. We talked a little more, and then just spent the day hanging out. We ordered pizza and sat around watching movies and South Park for most of the day. It was nice to just do something really laid back, because we were both pretty tired today after talking all night last night. He got some sleep last night, but I didn't. I did manage to take a short nap though. Good thing, because I felt like I would have died without it. I'm really glad he asked me to talk rather than keeping it to himself and letting it build up and eat at him even more. Both of us have a hard time dealing with and talking about emotions. Our addiction problems make that pretty obvious. I've been working on the whole dealing with emotions thing a lot the past few years, but I'm still not very good at it. I'm even worse at talking about emotions. I can talk about other people's just fine, but it's harder to talk about my own. I've definitely made some major strides though. I'm like 100 times better at dealing with all that stuff now than I was before. B is working on the same thing. But he's newly sober and really young, so he has a lot to learn. We both do. So it's kind of cool to be able to help each other with that. Even though it sucks that he was feeling the way he was feeling, I think that conversation strengthened our bond even more.

I kinda feel like I'm part brother and part father figure. I feel much more like a big brother than a parent to him though. But there are some parent/child type elements in our relationship, for sure. It's not my job to parent him, but he needs some guidance and "parental support", for lack of a better way of putting it. I'm tired and groggy, so I can't really articulate very well right now. I don't tell him what to do or anything, so I'm not a parental figure in that way. He just needs some structure, guidance, and support, so I feel kind of like a parent to him in that way. In almost every other way I think I'm more like a big brother to him though. I think of him as a little brother, not as my son or anything. I'm not old enough to be his parent, haha. Well, unless I would have had a kid in 8th grade. So it's definitely more of a little brother type thing. I love the kid to death, so I'm glad he feels like he can open up to me and trust me. I really hope I can help him in the long run, and not just in the present. He's so young, and he has his whole life ahead of him. I don't want him to have to go through all the shit I went through. He's already been through A LOT. I didn't get it together until I was a decade older than he is. I'm hoping this early intervention will help him avoid a future like that. I'll do anything and everything I can to help him.

Sorry for babbling. Tired talk. I need to go to bed. Maybe I'll go do that now. Well, after The Daily Show is over. Lord knows I'm in dire need of sleep!
xxmadsenxx: (Default)
This is kind of a short, pointless post, but I'm amused by it.

Jenny made breakfast for all of us this morning, which was sweet. She made pancakes, eggs, and breakfast potatoes (like hashbrowns). We usually just kinda do cereal in the morning, so it was a nice treat to have her cook.

Scrambled eggs are one of Evan's diet staples. They're one of his favorite foods, and I make them for him regularly. More often for lunch or dinner or even a snack than for breakfast though, unless it's a weekend. Anyway, he was eating his eggs this morning and I casually asked, "How are your eggs, bud?" His response was "They're good. Just not as good as yours. You're the best egg cooker." Now I feel kinda bad for asking him that, since Jenny heard his answer. She didn't seem too bugged by it though. Just kinda shrugged it off. I personally was amused by the situation. I love how candid young children are, about even the smallest things.

Now I have two culinary claims to fame. According to my son, I already hold the title of "best grilled cheese sandwich maker ever", and now I get to add "best egg scrambler" to my cooking resume, haha.

Ok, that's enough of this uneventful morning update, because I already need a nap. I'm so glad I get one. Naps are kind of a rare thing for me, so it's always nice when I can take one. I'm going to take full advantage of it today.


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April 2013



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