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It's kinda funny yet sad that I had to come home early because Jenny got upset after watching one of those Kardashian shows. Well, I didn't have to, but she was upset and I was able to leave early, so I did. I didn't really know what the hell was going on, so I texted B and asked him to distract Evan by playing video games or something so that I could talk to Jenny. She really watches E! way too much. It was the show with Khloe (WHY do I have to know their names?) and her husband. I hate shit like that. But anyway, she gave me a summary of the episode. Khloe wants to get pregnant, and she went to the doctor and found out that she might have endometriosis. She's worried that she won't be able to have a baby because of it, and talks about how a lot of women with endometriosis can't get pregnant. Then she finds out that she doesn't have it. The subject matter upset Jenny, since it hit close to home. But getting upset over a fucking Kardashian show? Seriously? Of all shows to have an emotional reaction to?

She said "What if I can't get pregnant again, or if I have another miscarriage?" And then she said something ridiculous: "Khloe was saying she was afraid because a lot of husbands leave if their wives can't get pregnant. I don't want that to happen." My response was kind of insensitive, I guess. But I really couldn't believe that stupid show upset her so much. I said "That's stupid. You're really this upset because of Khloe Kardashian's stupid show? Seriously?" Then she said "You don't have to be an asshole about it. It's not the show, it's the subject matter." So I apologized. She said "I'm just afraid. Just, what if I can't have another baby? What would happen then?" I was still thinking "this is so fucking stupid", but of course I didn't say that. I told her she had nothing to be afraid of, and that nothing would happen if she couldn't have another baby. I said it was stupid that the thought of me leaving her because of that would even cross her mind. She told me to stop saying everything was stupid. I realized I shouldn't have phrased it that way and apologized. I told her that I would never leave her because of something like that, even if Evan wasn't here and we could never have any kids at all. I really don't see how she could think I would do that. I don't know if she's just being insecure and worrying because she's upset or if she's kind of milking it, because sometimes she's just overly dramatic for no good reason. Not as much as she used to be, but it still happens sometimes. I don't think she does it on purpose all the time, but I think it's at least partially intentional sometimes. Either way, she's blowing things way out of proportion. I can understand worrying about not being able to have another baby just because we both really want one, but worrying about that other shit is just stupid.

We both want another baby, but if we can't have one it's not the end of the world. I'm happy with the one we have. Plus there's always the adoption option. But I think she'll be able to have more kids. Her doctor said that she shouldn't have trouble with it after the surgery. I mean, it's not a 100% guarantee. But even her doctor said she shouldn't worry about it, so she really shouldn't worry as much as she does. It's not like today is the first time she's been worried about that...she worries about it quite a bit. That and miscarrying again. I think that's a big concern for both of us. I've said this many times before, but the second miscarriage was way harder than the first one since she was almost 15 weeks pregnant when it happened. Neither of us want to go through that again, but if it happens, it happens. I really hope it won't, but there's nothing we can do about it. I honestly think everything will be fine now though.

Women are weird sometimes.

Well, I'm off to go see that stupid Smurfs movie.
xxmadsenxx: (Default)
Jenny just found out that she has endometriosis, and apparently it's pretty severe. Not insanely bad, but nowhere near mild. She found out yesterday when she went to a new doctor, because she's been having really bad pains. I'm not sure how her old doctor missed it, because this one said it's pretty bad. Maybe she didn't have it before? Or maybe her old doctor just sucked. I don't know. I have no idea how that works. I know what endometriosis is, but I don't really know very much about it. I need to read up on it.

She asked if the miscarriages she's had could be related to the endometriosis, and the doctor said it might have had something to do with it. She's going to try some type of hormone treatment, so hopefully that will work. But her doctor said there's a good chance she'll need surgery, since it's pretty bad. So we'll see. Hopefully that won't be the case though.

We have talked about trying to have another baby, so I hope whatever treatment she has to do will help with that. The last miscarriage was pretty hard to deal with...especially for her. I think miscarriages are pretty difficult to deal with in general, but the fact that she was almost 15 weeks along made it even harder. I don't really want to go through that again, and I REALLY don't want her to have to go through that again. She took it really hard, and it was pretty traumatizing for her.

Now for some happier stuff...

We're having a joint Father's Day/Jenny's birthday BBQ on Sunday. I'm glad B is going to be there, rather than going to his parents' house for Father's Day. But then again, it's not exactly surprising that he's not going there, because he hates his dad. His dad is an asshole. Regardless of the reason, it will be fun to have him here. It really is like having a little brother. He has already kinda become part of the family. It's pretty cool. He has been doing everything he's supposed to be doing and more. He helps around the house a ton. He does WAY more than I would ever ask him to do. I guess I can't complain about that though...less for me to do haha.


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April 2013



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